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My All

I'm not a star, nor am I a diamond.
I'm not her, nor am I a comparison.
But I'd give my all just to see you smile.
I'd lie on the floor, to catch you when you fall
I'd love you with each beat of my fragile heart
And I would give you my soul if my heart isn't enough.
I'd hold you close and wish for tomorrow
If it does not come,
I'd have nothing to regret;
I'd have given you my all and never held back.
You'd make my world alright
With just a glance of your eye.
I know for a fact I'd never have to cry
You'd wash away the pain and the lies
Protect me from all the dangers of all goodbyes.
For you I'd give my all.
For you I'd never be afraid to fall.
To you I give My All.

 

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Posted by on August 11, 2017 in Poetry, Tori's Poetry

 

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My Bee

Forward is the way

They say

Onward to the future

There’s treasure

The past holds naught for you

The future is all new

Dwell not on what you had

Think of what you could and will have

What if the past is my bee

Sweet like honey

It stung once but kept me coming back

The only place I could cry

And still find the reason to smile

I cannot look forward

When my past is still my joy

The only part I still need and want

How can I look for the next treasure

If my heart already holds the most precious

You have been my past

I want you to be my present

And when tomorrow comes

Above everything else

I need you to be my future

You are the bee I desire to have

So here I am

Still waiting

When you wake up tomorrow

Call me up

And I will still be waiting.

 
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Posted by on August 10, 2017 in Poetry, Tori's Poetry

 

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Reality

When do we realize it’s too late to walk away?

When the heart aches

And the air in your lungs become limited

When your sleeps are cut short

And your dreams fretful

When you chew food that tastes like marble

And walk without seeing where you’re going

When do we realize there is no chance of walking away?

When the alarm rings and the sun sets

When you walk but never reach your destination

When the tears that roll down your face

And the light inside you burns out

When the faces of the people you see are no longer familiar

And the bed you sleep in is too lonesome

When do we realize every action we take is pointless?

When we pick up the phone but can’t dial a number

When we meet and there are no words to be said

When we wake up and realize darkness still surrounds us

When the pain inside you can no longer be held in

And the air you breathe in slices through you

Like the wind of a winter morning

When do we realize it’s time to let go?

And keep walking

Even if the destination is unknown

And the journey is filled with uncertainty

When the clock keeps ticking

And you are left frozen in that moment.

 
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Posted by on July 19, 2017 in Poetry, Tori's Poetry

 

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Love / Hate / The finer Line

A normal person would take a lot of time to do everything possible to have the person they love, love them back. They would show their love through kindness and generosity, and care and words – whatever it takes, because they know that that love is precious to them and is what would make them happy -but that is what a normal person would do.

A person who would do anything possible to get someone else to hate them because they are too scared of the truth or facing the possibility that someone is capable of loving them wholly and completely must certainly be evil. How could you possibly trade the greatest thing God ever made for the worst thing that ever sprouted out of man’s once pure heart? Hate over Love?

Most people are searching for love, desperate for it. Some spend a lifetime never truly experiencing this amazing one-of-a-kind feeling, never knowing what it’s like to love and be loved; and yet there are other people who would easily throw it away, do horrible and unfathomable things to people who love them just because they are scared and cruel.

But here’s the thing, love is love. It can never be traded for hate, it can never be replaced or tainted or forgotten. It can hurt, but it will always find the strength to let go and forgive, to heal in due time and grow again. IF what you feel in your heart is truly Love and not a semblance of it, then no matter how horrible a person is, no matter how hurt you get, you will always find a way to forgive, because hating someone is so much harder than to just love them, and because that Love is truer than anything else, stronger than any mistake or pain.

There’s no such thing as “one day she/he will get tired of loving you” – if they get tired of loving you then they never really did in the first place. Love can never get tired. It just understands that sometimes this person was not the right one for me, he/she has already moved on and found something better, and one day I will too. Do not listen to someone who tells you that Love isn’t worth it, that it will eventually end, that they will hurt you in ways you can’t imagine and you will hate them, because that is a lie.

Love IS worth it, it will never end. Yes, it will hurt at some point, but you will always find the strength within that love to heal and forgive. When they hurt you, look into your heart, find that part of you that knows the truth, that realizes that whatever they are doing to hurt you is because they may be scared, or aren’t ready for your love, so they will hurt you in the hope of chasing you away by hate.

Once you get past the anger and pain, you will open your eyes and you will see the truth. You will forgive them and possibly still love them because you know they need that love, that pure and strong love. If they choose to use you as an outlet for all the things they cannot let out elsewhere, let them. Be that outlet for them, be the strength they need and give them the Love only you know how.

IF you truly Love someone and you believe they are worth it, do not ever let them push you away through hate because of their fear. Let them find another way, an honest way, not the cowardice way!

 
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Posted by on June 3, 2017 in Drama, Faith, Me. You. US, Social Life, The Globe

 

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Fear o’ Fear – let me not lose

Don’t let the fear of failure keep you from achieving greatness!

fear
ˈfir/
noun
noun: fear; plural noun: fears
1.an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

It is simply an emotion, it is not a wall of concrete that you will be unable to break down; or a lion that will devour you if you cross its path.
Emotions – they come and they go, but if you do not learn to control them, then you are giving them power to control you. If you do not fight the fear of getting hurt, of having your pride slightly injured, of failing once in order to excel later, then you have no chance of living the life you know you deserve.
There is so much that you can accomplish in your life, so much potential that you have not even begun to explore; but when you just sit and wait for things to happen because you’re afraid that if you make the first move you might lose and look like a fool, then there is no chance you will ever discover just how amazing you could possibly be. Why would you not take a risk at losing so that you can learn and make it a win later? If you never try, then how could you possibly know if it was meant to happen? If you never take a chance at losing, how could you know if you might have won?
Stop living in one place for so long, never leaving your comfort zone to discover all the other great things the world has to offer. You’ve been living in one town all these years, haven’t even made it to the next city because you’re scared, even though you’re so miserable and unsatisfied. Have the courage to step out of that comfort zone and go see the world. Find that place where both your heart, body and mind can be satisfied; where peace of mind and soul means strength and pure happiness.
We can’t have everything we want in life, but at least we can do what is possible to get what the world will be willing to offer. You will never know what you deserve, what you can and cannot have unless you step away from the fear that holds you back and go for it.
Do not listen to what others have to say, what they think you can and cannot do – that is their own fear speaking, holding you back. Be strong enough to step away from the fears of others that would hold you back from your own greatness.
Be your own Voice of Encouragement! Be your own Judge of what you can and cannot do! But never let yourself bring YOU down!
 
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Posted by on May 15, 2017 in Me. You. US, The Globe

 

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BLAAAAAAH!

You know when you wake up one day and wonder if this is going to be a good day?

What is the first thought that crosses your mind when you realize dawn has come? Is it, what am i going to eat today? Where will I get money for my children? Will I meet someone interesting today? Will I meet the love of my life? Will I get through the day without falling apart?

We are all each so very different and one person can not possibly ask themselves all those questions, and if they do then they are probably not gonna get through the day without falling apart. We have so many answered thoughts, most of which we carry about unnecessarily and makes us feel like everything we do is against us.

And I am writing this post, not coz I have anything interesting to say, but simply coz I wanna put these thoughts down and not have them in my head.

Whatever I write here is not necessarily what you expected to read or what you wanted to hear. Maybe you were hoping I would post something that would make you feel like the world is still turning, but guess what, whether I do write it or not, the world is still turning. Whether you are aware of it or not, time is not waiting for you, and by the time you wake up and realize it, it’s probably too late.

So, no, I am not writing what you wanted to hear, but here’s a little secret – I’ve been waiting for someone to tell me what I think I need to hear because I’m looking for ways to explain all the crazy things going on in my life, but truth is, you already know what you need to do and maybe you’re just too scared to face the reality. And yes, life can be one scary hole sometimes, but at the end of the day, if we keep living in that bubble of scariness, waiting for someone else to pull you out of it, you might find yourself living in that bubble all your life.

Some things you learn to live through, to push through, no matter how impossible it may seem. Not everything in live is going to be easy; parents will raise you up, tell you to study hard, to get a job, but the worst thing they will never do, it tell you just exactly how hard it’s going to be to push through the days you wish you had never been born; they will not give you the hows or whys of why some people will walk all over you, or how to forgive those who wrong you, because those are some things you will just have to learn for yourself, and believe you me, the day you learn to live through those moments, you will come out of it stronger than you’ve ever been and everyday you will push through, just one step at a time.

No matter how impossible something may seem, no matter how painful it may be, you have the strength within you that you could ever need to get through anything the world has to throw at you. All you gotta do is BELIEVE in yourself. It will never be easy, but maybe one day, it may just be worth it!

 

 
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Posted by on January 26, 2017 in Me. You. US, Social Life, The Globe

 

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Nothingness

How does one live without their heart?

When you have lost it, what is there that keeps you going? How do you breathe? Are you even alive anymore? When all you feel is hollowness, an emptiness so big it’s like an abyss?

Do you keep breathing? When you wake up everyday and know that the inside of your chest is a hollow bottom? The hole so deep there’s no end?  You keep that smile on your face and let everyone think you got it all under control when inside it’s like a raging storm?

How do you live when you know that your heart is lost? Do you still live or are you just going through the motions like an animal? With no purpose or destination?

When the storm rages on and you plaster a smile on your face so they don’t see your weakness, your fear running so deep it’s a pit of blackness; is that the part you are living for?

 
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Posted by on November 7, 2016 in Me. You. US, Social Life, The Globe

 

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